Of all my shenanigans this week I could share, I will tell you about my poor Ethan falling victim to my killer sweet tooth, and not for the first time and (probably not for the last)! He will eventually learn to hide his sweets!
Yes, yes, last week I did write about self-control and then being humbled by the fact that my self-control needs a good work-out.
I’m a whole nut girl, no, not a whole nutter!! Although some might say I am. ( innocent eyelash flutter)
My go-to chocolate of choice would always be a Cadburys whole nut bar and no not this silly chopped carry on I’ve been seeing recently. I love the big fat nuts in the chocolate. (no this blog is not sponsored, but if anyone works for Cadburys feel free to pass my details). I do love Galaxy, but Cadbury wins hands down.
So when we stopped at the garage for Wednesday’s treats I bought myself a single bar of whole nut, yummy, and Ethan got a share size bar of Galaxy because they are a similar price to the single bars.
We went home, homework done, I left the boys watching TV to go and make dinner. I opened the fridge and Ethan’s Galaxy chocolate bar was sitting on the fridge shelf unwrapped winking at me (how rude). I thought, oh one bit won’t do any harm, he probably won’t notice. So I slipped that silky smooth chocolate piece in my mouth (dirty rotten Cadburys traitor), but then I had to go back into the fridge several more times. With a few more guilty nibbles, the bar of chocolate was left significantly smaller than when Ethan first put it there. (sorry, not sorry )
Ethan had forgotten about the bar and the evening passed without mention or exposure of the chocolate heist. Just when I thought I was off the hook and in the clear, I heard the fridge door open then a very distinctive huh! wait! what! from Ethan. I’m sure I stopped breathing for a second when I heard that slow drawn out Mom shout up from the kitchen.
(Hello why am I his suspect? There are two brothers in the house!! why me? innocent eye roll). Yes, pet, I quickly questioned. Have you been eating my Galaxy bar in the fridge was his question came as he started to walk up the stairs to me. I almost said Ethan you know I’m a whole nut girl.
I had been lying up on my bed reading and panic mode set in as a sudden wave of guilt covered me. I replied, “what makes you think that?” (Ha! could I make him doubt his conviction? )
His almost sarcastic reply came, “Emm because there used to be like twenty pieces and now there are five.” (exaggerated much? Ethan) I sank down into my bed and didn’t reply. When his beautiful wee face popped through my bedroom door, his eyes squinted, hands on the hip with an I know you did it and you will admit it to me woman expression on his face, he asked, “well Mum?”
I playfully put my hand up and said, “guiltily as charged.” “I knew it!”, he shirked. I offered to replace it at the next visit to the shops.
He was happy enough with that and he walked off to enjoy the last few pieces of chocolate he had managed to salvage from his mother’s fridge invasion
After he left my room, I couldn’t help think how strange my reaction had been to such a minor incident. It barely caused Ethan any annoyance at all. Yet, I was going all cloak and dagger on my cover-up. Extreme lengths to hide my guilt and not give him a straight answer to his question over chocolate theft. How silly!!
What was that all about? Did I fear the” wrath of Ethan”? (ha). Not likely, Ethan is the kindest, most generous kid out. He would lift a sweet out of his own mouth and give it to you if he thought it would make you happy, so it wasn’t an issue of Ethan’s fury or rage.
What could it be? Why did I do that? I felt God whisper, you do that with me too..
Ek!… excuse me no I don’t! came my quick defensive reply.
You ever feel God’s toe-tapping, waiting for you to catch yourself on? This was this moment.
Again, he got me good.
I do, don’t I!
I have wee slip ups here and there and rather than just fessing up and asking God to forgive me, strengthen and lead me in the right way, I let it fester. I stick my head in the sand and ignore the fact that this particular “incident” I avoiding taking to God.
By doing this I make it an awkward thing to go to God about. I’m the one who put the unnecessary distance in between me and God.
My guilt and shame can create a divide, and It feels like I’m not as connected to God. The same as I would have done with Ethan, as silly as it was, I was going to avoid him over a couple pieces of chocolate. Really?
And yet as soon as I confessed he immediately forgave me. No questions asked, he forgave me because he knows I love chocolate and the temptation was too much, or I just didn’t use any darn self-control.
He knows well enough to know it wasn’t out of malice or intention to hurt him.
It’s the same with God when I get it wrong or mess up, like when I get drawn into gossip or lose my temper or tell a lie or purposely bend the truth. When I think badly of someone or am rude or unloving when my patience is short. Sin doesn’t have to be murder or theft before we confess it. The Bible tells us to confess our sins so that we can be forgiven. I love this Passion Bible translation.
“But if we freely admit our sins when his light uncovers them, he will be faithful to forgive us every time. God is just to forgive us our sins because of Christ, and he will continue to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
1 John 1:9 TPT
We all fall short, no one is perfect, we all have areas that we need God to strengthen in us.
It’s what we do after we mess up that matters most. Don’t hide from it, don’t try and bury it in the sand in the hope it will magically disappear. If you know you’re wrong, take it to God, confess and ask for his help. You won’t be met with an angry, unforgiving God that makes you sweat it and wait. You’re not sent away to write out the Lord’s Prayer two hundred times ( but here! this sounds like a good plan for my kids lol) before you receive forgiveness. Jesus already did all the hard work for you; you just need to go to God apologize and ask him to forgive you. The Bible also tells us that in our wrongdoing if we sin against someone else to go to them admit your mistake and ask their forgiveness also.
“Confess and acknowledge how you have offended one another and then pray for one another to be instantly healed, for tremendous power is released through the passionate, heartfelt prayer of a godly believer!”
James (Jacob) 5:16 TPT
Now I don’t know about you but I think that is pretty darn spectacular.
We ALL mess up, we get it wrong, then we carry it around like a big heavyweight and it weighs us down and causes us to back away from God because we feel bad or embarrassed or believe lies that God will be cross or won’t forgive us. But God is saying it’s ok, Jesus sorted this for you, he bought your forgiveness already. Come on give it over to me and let me help you do better next time.
and just like that, we get to give our wrongs over to God and get a clean slate.
pretty Epic, really!
sticky fingers out!